I'm really sick of not being able to get good at this game

Years of my fucking life down the drain for fucking silver 1 and hundreds of mediocre performances against bronze players, 80% of my games im playing broken champs like Fizz and Fiora and Galio and yet I still have no fucking clue how to play this game and its driving me to Tyler1 my fucking house, I already got a 14 day ban for toxcity and god willing i'll get perma banned soon so I can bury my head in the fucking sands, watching streams, LCS, other players in game its all a disgusting fucking pile of shit, I gotta have cripling autism I DESERVED TO BE FUCKING EUTHIEIESWOPWEJFWEOIFJEOIFBEWPGFIUWEOHGWE9UGIBPIEBGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH'seoig;ewhgpirweu
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