I Need help! PLease can anyone assist me

I am on the verge of mental break I have played over 900 games no matter what i doo i keep taking 3 steps back.....My only aim is to get to gold....I have worked so hard I was bronze 4 last season and i managed to make it all the way to silver one....and now it seems that i cannot get to where Im striving for...i will win lane and lose games ...I will help my team and lose games....i will try to keeep everyone positive and lose games...what am i doing wrong!.....I know im not a perfect person I know Im human and I try my best but why do I keep getting games like this Jesus .......I am on the brink on mental collapse. PLEASE CAN ANYONE WHO HAS EXPERIENCE WITH THIS SORT OF THING WATCH SOME OF MY GaMES AND TELL ME WHAT IS HAPPENING AND WHY IT KEEPS HAPPENING......PLEASE REALLY NEED YOU GUYS PLEASE!!!
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