What does playing league make you feel?

I'm not a keyboard smashing streamer when I play league. My frustration is either manic energy if I'm playing with friends or self loathing borderline suicidal hatred at myself. I've never thought I'd get to the point where a fucking video game makes me feel so sad and angry at my mistakes that it makes me feel like this. Please note, I haven't played in two days, this is all with a clear head. From seeing chat logs I can see most people blame others first and I guess it's an easier way out but... I never flame others, and when they flame me it gets into my head, confirms my inferiority complex. I have actual stress when I start queuing up for ranked, afraid I'll disappoint my team. Playing league just makes me feel... awful...
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We're testing a new feature that gives the option to view discussion comments in chronological order. Some testers have pointed out situations in which they feel a linear view could be helpful, so we'd like see how you guys make use of it.

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