I'm mainly posting this because I know I'm not the first and won't be the last to have this issue and people in the future googling this issue like I did might stumble upon this so I can give a live update to dealing with this issue, but yeah as title says.
The last time I played League of Legends was September 7th, 2019 with my friend and the last match we played that day was an ARAM match where I rolled Kennen: https://matchhistory.na.leagueoflegends.com/en/#match-details/NA1/3144576718/226654117?tab=overview
After that match, I decided to take a break from League and go back to my Planetside 2 binge.
When I logged back in today, i got blasted with an "ACCOUNT BANNED" box telling me I was permanently banned for use of third-party programs. And my jaw hit the floor. My first though was "god is Discord or something flagging Riot's detection? That's the only thing I can think of as I have no other apps or anything that I run parallel with my games...I better warn people!" but then I thought "wait...no that's stupid..." and went and checked my match history.
And lo-and-behold look what I found:
Three games, played on ARAM I can only assume to try to match my own play behavior by some greasy fuck who managed to get in to my account to do what I'm assuming is testing some new cheat or botting software.
I went to submit an account suspension ticket but then saw when I said I was banned for use of third-party software Riot flat out tells you "If your account was suspended for use of third party software while your account was compromised, submit an account recovery ticket instead" so I went and did that, and now I'm waiting on the results.
I really REALLY wish there was some 2-factor authentication system set up. Pretty much all of my accounts everywhere use it these days. Even just a basic SMS system where you link a phone number to your account and whenever somebody logs in you get a text with a code you have to enter to continue.
The fact that League is as huge as it is, has as big an issue with people trying to make farming bots and getting in to people's accounts as it does just baffles me that this isn't something they have standard. Hell, set it up and give new accounts Teemo and a trash skin for free if they set up 2FA to encourage everybody to use it.
Anyway, that's my story, hopefully this gets resolved quick, I'll keep you all updated.
UPDATE: I got a response from Riot Support and after verifying my ownership of my account they lifted the ban and had me update my account info.
I still think it's ridiculous that even just SMS-based 2FA isn't an option but oh well. At least I got my account back.