: > [{quoted}](name=HopefulAndGay,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=ctEgnZHK,comment-id=00000000,timestamp=2019-10-23T20:06:10.990+0000)I hope you don’t mind me responding. That's what this board is for! > For her W, that was actually another thing I didn’t mention. The knockback hits the enemy into the fire cone. I figured it did. But you're still a melee character who has a single gapcloser (and a second one attached to auto-attacking) but knocks people *out of her own melee range*. > I really super appreciate the feedback! I’m massively new to making champs, so constructive criticism like this is really helpful. Thanks so much. Any time! I've got quite a lot of experience with it myself, so I try to help out whenever I can. :) I'd strongly consider some adjustments to avoid *three* fields of fire though. It makes it really hard for enemies to know which ones (or how many) they're standing in!
I think I have a good idea for a reworked W. Omit the fire zone and the knockback, and just have the spin and the actual blast of fire.
: Cool stuff! Let's dig in. > In the surgery room, weeks later, Innez was fitted with a lung filter and well as new mechanical arms and legs. However, Innez, unsatisfied with simply being ‘fixed’, saw the true potential of augmenting herself, and found her satisfaction on the black market. A flamethrower in her arm, a stock of thermite missiles, and thrusters on her back have transformed Innez into a blazing war machine, burning a swathe through wherever she goes. Minor point -- this feels *so* much more Zaun than Piltover. The reckless self-endangerment, the hextech augmentation, becoming a weapon... > Passive: Combustion Drive > Innez gains a stack of KABOOM! with every ability she lands. Upon basic attacking an enemy with stacks, Innez consumes all the stacks to deal bonus damage and gain a short burst of movement speed. This is a little odd to me. It's not a super Vanguard-y move, although I like it in theory. It also *needs* to have a stack limit, or you'll just Q up over and over until your Vanguard one-shots an enemy. Ultimately, I'm a little upset that it's best used by a simple attack-spell-attack-spell pattern, because it *feels* like something I'd want to stack up but I don't really get a benefit for doing so save on my first attack. I might actually consider turning this into a stacking effect that unlocks something big like a stun + explosion on an attack or a powerful knock-back, so that it feels like something you really build up to and then unleash as a big KABOOM! > Q: Ka-Bang Bomb > 60/65/70 Mana > Innez fires a thermite bomb to a target location, which then bursts into a puddle of flame that persists for a few moments. Adds a stack of Combustion. Fairly generic ability here. No real complains, but also nothing revolutionary. I might consider adding a small slow (either on impact or in the AoE) to help you fill the Vanguard role. > W: Engage Thrusters! > 50 Mana > Innez spins, dealing damage around her while knocking back nearby enemies. At the end of the spin, Innez fires a cone of thermite out in front of her, creating a fire zone. A fun ability, but not really a Vanguard ability, and *especially* not an ability for a melee-range Vanguard who wants to auto-attack people. You actually end up knocking people *out* of your passive range, and this means you'll have *three* zones of fire (counting the ultimate) which will get confusing fast. I'd consider redesigning this one, although I like it as an ability on its own merits (i.e. not on this kit). > E: Full Throttle/Burning Blast > 65/75/90 Mana > First Cast: Innez dashes in a direction while coating herself in fire, granting a shield and dealing burn damage to anyone hit. After reaching the end of the dash, the second cast is unlocked. > > Second Cast: Innez fires her shield as a projectile in a target direction, functioning as a short-range skillshot that damages and slows the first enemy champion hit. This one is fun. Do you lose the shield on the recast? I'm hoping not, because it's a fun ability but I wouldn't want to lose the shield in most circumstances. Probably my favorite ability so far, although I'd consider making the skillshot deal bonus damage to burning enemies so you get a nice reward if you manage to dash *through* your target and can thus reduce the cooldown a bit and use this as a fight opener *and* a mid-fight tool. > R: Hextech Immolation Strike > 100 Mana > Innez targets an area on the map within a medium range of her. After a few seconds, a gigantic bomb drops on that location, dealing magic damage and knocking back anyone in the area. The bomb persists for some time, and if Innez strikes it with an ability while it persists, it detonates, coating a gigantic, star-burst-shaped area in fire. I feel like you have enough abilities you could just make this a recast effect, but knocking people *out* of the area that the bomb will explode in feels a bit bad to me. The enemy's already out of the area! Sure, it's solid zone denial, but you're a Vanguard and want to be *in* the fight. --------------------------------------- You have some really cool stuff here. I don't think it comes together super cleanly as a unified kit though, and I'm not sure it fills the Vanguard role well. It feels much more about zone denial and knockbacks than aggressively diving into a fight with big engage effects and lock-downs, and it lacks the explosive initiation I've come to expect from Vanguards because it tends to scatter enemies fairly unreliably. I think you can tweak this a bit to be really cool though!
Oh wow! Awesome feedback, thank you! I’ll admit I wasn’t expecting this. I hope you don’t mind me responding. As for her backstory, I would have made her a Zaunite, but I frankly don’t know enough about Zaun. If it seems fitting, though, then hell yeah. I’ll make her a Zaunite. For her passive, I neglected to mention that the stack limit is 5, and the damage increases more with each one. I think a stun is actually a great idea for an addition, though! I’ll add that. On her Q, I think a slow is actually a good idea! I’ll change that. For her W, that was actually another thing I didn’t mention. The knockback hits the enemy into the fire cone. For the E, nope. You don’t lose the shield. I would do that, but it seems counter-intuitive for a tank. Her ult would honestly work better if I made the change to a knock UP, not a knock BACK, so I’ll probably do that. The recast? Maybe. I’ll consider that for sure. I really super appreciate the feedback! I’m massively new to making champs, so constructive criticism like this is really helpful. Thanks so much.
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: Ornn need a new skin
Qiyana only has one. just sayin'.
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HopefulAndGay

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